Thursday, October 28, 2010

Fight, flight, forget?

Well, this is embarrassing. Has it really been one month since my last post? 

Time has managed to creep up on me like those pesky pounds during the holiday season-- you just never know how bad it's gotten until "HOLY SHIT! I swear these jeans fit yesterday!" 

All I have to say is... Okay, maybe that's where my problem starts. 

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This is the story of a girl who...
Last weekend I tried...
I bought 14 jars of mustard because...

You've all heard of writer's block. Now meet it's evil twin sister: blogger's block. 

It's not that I haven't come across relevant material. In fact, over the past month I've been to some truly incredible places, eaten amazing food, and seen some pretty cool things. 

But what to write? A slight, nagging uneasiness kept reminding me, Isn't there something you should be updating? Like maybe... your blog?

I'll be the first to admit, I have a not-so-awesome quality. (If you're reading this as a potential employer, feel free to stop here and refer to my ridiculously good looking resume.)

The thing is, when something stresses me out, my reflex is to create a mental block. I'll do anything imaginable just forget about the job at hand. Sometimes, my creativity in coming up with useless tasks can surprise even myself. 

Case and point, my I-hate-all-forms-of-literature phase. Or any one of these examples...

Essay due in six hours-- It's about time I rearrange my room. 
Need to pack for a trip-- I think I'll just go for a quick run. 
Too many pictures to post-- I wonder what's changed on Facebook since 10 minutes ago?
Blog to update-- I'm just waiting until I think of a brilliant topic! 

See it all coming together now?

If I dig down to the root of my anxiety, without getting too weird, it's the fact that my semester in Paris is quite literally FLYING by. We passed by the halfway point faster than the time it takes me to polish off a block of brie. And tha's fast!

When I think of everything that has yet to be crossed off my imaginary to-do list (I keep meaning to make one... how ironic), it's enough to make my head spin. And obviously, stress me out. 

It's not until I realize all the things I've already done that I come back to Earth. I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that no one can do everything in just three months. What I can try to do now is not take a single day here for granted and appreciate what time I have left. 

And that's about enough cheese for one post. 

I promise the next one won't take a month...